My Life

I realized awhile ago that I've been blogging for some time now and most of you probably don't know my story. So on that note...

My relationship with Jesus is comparable to waiting in a really long line for the opening night of a movie. This movie could be one that you have heard of before, one that your friend dragged you to, or maybe you just stumbled upon a crowd and jumped in line. Sitting at the ticket counter is Jesus, and He is handing out tickets for redemption and every time I would get closer and closer to the front I would have doubts about my intent on seeing this ‘movie’ or what the movie was really about, and run to the back of the line.

My life before getting in line wasn’t bad at all. My parents divorced when I was seven, and although that was a huge bummer they made my brothers and my life very easy, all things considering. So growing up I knew what love was and felt like from my parents and family, but I didn’t know the full extent of what love really was.

Going into high school I really wanted to make new friends and be well liked by everyone. With this need and desire to fit in I began to change who I was. I started to say and do things I knew were wrong. With my parents and at school I was the good kid, the student involved in school and sports and who got good grades. With my friends I was someone different. I didn’t like the person I was becoming.

When I was a sophomore one of my friends began to invite me to her church and to check out her youth group. I really enjoyed going. The people were really cool and nice and there was music, food, and did I mention cute boys. It was at a winter retreat in 2008 that I really felt God’s presence for the first time. It was finally explained to me the love God had for us by sending His son to die on the cross for our sins. The last night we were there I knew this is the acceptance and love that I had been searching for; that night I decided to accept Christ as my Lord and Savior. I actively pursued my newfound faith for the remainder of the year but without the passion and dedication for the Lord I once had, I quickly fell away.

Soon there after my once sturdy family life quickly began to collapse from underneath me. Through a series of events it was revealed to me that my step-mom was an alcoholic and had been for most of the time I knew her. Shortly after that my mom and step-dad were going through the process of a divorce when he tried to commit suicide. Luckily God intervened and he was OK, but at the time I didn’t see God’s presence in the situation.

I continued of the destructive path I was going down turning to drugs and alcohol to cope with all the craziness happening around me, making stupid decisions and losing friends along the way.

I decided to go to college at the University of Wisconsin- Madison because of its prestigious title and the fact it was a well-known party school. The first year and a half of school was filled with finding friends and joining school clubs and going out on the weekends; there was a lot of going out on the weekends. Then the summer before my sophomore year happened. I was hanging out with the wrong crowd and ended up in a lot of trouble. It seemed that everything I had worked for in my college career was going to be taken away. I played it a little more cautiously that first semester back but I ended up feeling lonely and depressed for most of it.

Then something unexpected and wonderful happened to me. Over winter break one of my good friends I had known since 1^st grade, asked me to attend a Christian ministry on her campus called Cru. I went not expecting much and was totally blown away by the amount of love and passion for God these college students had.

In that moment I knew what I was missing. In that moment I knew I didn’t need the approval and love of my family and friends. I needed the perfect love of a Savior who was willing to give me the ultimate gift of new life. I knew I needed a heart change.

Coming back to campus the second semester, I felt different; a good different though. My eyes were finally opened to the fact that the last four or five years of my life were nothing but empty. The next year and a half getting to know the Lord more was a whirlwind, to say the least.

I reconnected with friends from my youth group from so many years ago; I began leading in Cru and making new friends. I had a fire and passion for life that was new for me. And then He sent me here to North Myrtle Beach to pursue Him even more.

God truly changes lives. He brought me from darkness to light and revealed my own selfish desires for my life.  I had the ‘My way or the highway’ mentality, but God has one plan for my life. One that is perfect and glorifying to Him.

The beauty of this free gift God is giving us by sending His only Son to die for us is that we didn’t do anything to deserve it. Yet all we have to do is reach out and take it. All we have to do is get to the front of the ticket counter and take the ticket from Jesus, the one that paid it all.

Jesus is waiting for you to take the ticket. Are you ready?